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[personal profile] applecameron
Title: untitled
Fandom: Iron Man (movies)
Spoilers: none
Category: vignette, humor, genderswap
Date: I wrote this, according to the filestamp, in January 2009.

"What the hell did you *do*!" Pepper accused, after looking down.

Tony Stark's eyes got even wider. "This," accompanied by a hand gesture that failed to fully convey the mind-boggling *scope* of suddenly being female. And Pepper suddenly being male. "ThiswasNOTme."

A moment before, there had been a flash of light. That was it, as far as clues went.

Pepper loomed closely, biting off each word with sharp, even, teeth. "What. Did. You. Do." They were in Tony's lab. It was an entirely reasonable question.

Tony got in Pepper's face, only now his sparring position was glaring up from below. He was shorter, as a woman. But no less obnoxious.

They were both flushed with anger, nose to nose, practically kissing, and Pepper suddenly flushed to the roots of her - his - hair, took several steps backward, and grabbed a file folder off the workbench from where she'd dropped it when still a she, and held it in front of him.

Tony Stark was a smart guy. "Boner?" She said sweetly.

Pepper attacked. "Jesus, is this what being a man is like 24/7?"

"Pretty much."

"I always thought men were projecting when they accused women of being a mess of hormones." Pepper said, as loftily as possible while clutching a manila folder in front of one's groin.

It didn't help that their normal mode of interaction was to flirt-by-sparring. Or spar-by-flirting. Or something like that.

"You know..." Tony started, fingers reaching to rub her lips.

Pepper's fingers tightened on his impromptu shield. "We should figure out how to turn back, immediately."

"I'm all for that, only --"

"Only?" Pepper's voice was pleasantly deep.

"Only --" Tony - Toni? - stepped back into Pepper's range with something resembling a smirk on her features.

Pepper Potts was no slouch in the smart guy department either. "Only you're an empiricist." There was the tiniest hint of amusement in his voice.

"I believe in the scientific method," came her reply.

Pepper exercised newfound strength, reached forward, flung his boss over his shoulder, ignored the resulting squawk, and headed for the master suite, one large hand gripping Tony Stark's delectable upper thigh. "It's a method, Tony. You don't have to believe in it."

"Tell that to the creationist lobby." Tony quipped, fighting back but not too hard.
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