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applecameron ([personal profile] applecameron) wrote2004-08-26 03:00 pm

(SV) B5: Slinging Slang (R, vignette, dialogue, Marcus/Lennier)

by SV
Archived by author's permission



Subject: MCEB-ff Yet Another Smutty Test

Oh, heavens, how did that word get up there? 'Smut'. To Smut.
Smut. Smutter. Smuttest.

Smutly Whiplash? SmutWinkle and Rocky the Smutting Squirrel?

[gives self good shake]

sorry, people, don't know what came over me.

"Slingin' Slang"

"Are you drunk?"

"Maybe. Why?"

[pause] "I find it curious that alcohol has such different affects on us than you humans. We are so similar and yet so different."

[bleary calculation] "If I were a little less drunk, I just might invite you to explore some of those differences with me."

"Why would you have to be a little less drunk?"

[embarrassed look] "After alcohol, sometimes the spirit is willing, but the flesh....shall we say..."

"Oh. I see. Why don't you come back to my quarters with me -- "

"Look, Lennier, I just finished trying NOT to say I'd like to shag you to within an inch of your life and I can't even get it up --" Swallow. "Oop. Forget I said that."

"Shag me?"

[pause] "Yessssss." [pause] "That doesn't offend you?"

[thinking of that time in the monastery] "No." [pause] "I am honored you think so highly of me."

"Highly my ass." Muttered darkly, "bleedin' pedestal, more likely."

"Mmm. It is a very high 'ass'."

"Are you admiring my bum!?"

"Yes. Marcus, you have a very nice...uh...'bum'."

[drunken preen] "Thank you."

"In fact, I think I would like to -- am I saying this properly? -- 'shag it'. Your bum, I mean."

[boggle] "I believe I'll come with you back to your quarters after all, Lennier."

"Excellent. We can continue our language lesson there. In private."

[standing and much tipsy straightening of clothes] "I don't suppose you've got soundproofing?"

"We could find out."