applecameron (
applecameron) wrote2004-08-26 03:00 pm
(SV) B5: Slinging Slang (R, vignette, dialogue, Marcus/Lennier)
by SV
Archived by author's permission
Subject: MCEB-ff Yet Another Smutty Test
Oh, heavens, how did that word get up there? 'Smut'. To Smut.
Smut. Smutter. Smuttest.
Smutly Whiplash? SmutWinkle and Rocky the Smutting Squirrel?
[gives self good shake]
sorry, people, don't know what came over me.
"Slingin' Slang"
"Are you drunk?"
"Maybe. Why?"
[pause] "I find it curious that alcohol has such different affects on us than you humans. We are so similar and yet so different."
[bleary calculation] "If I were a little less drunk, I just might invite you to explore some of those differences with me."
"Why would you have to be a little less drunk?"
[embarrassed look] "After alcohol, sometimes the spirit is willing, but the flesh....shall we say..."
"Oh. I see. Why don't you come back to my quarters with me -- "
"Look, Lennier, I just finished trying NOT to say I'd like to shag you to within an inch of your life and I can't even get it up --" Swallow. "Oop. Forget I said that."
"Shag me?"
[pause] "Yessssss." [pause] "That doesn't offend you?"
[thinking of that time in the monastery] "No." [pause] "I am honored you think so highly of me."
"Highly my ass." Muttered darkly, "bleedin' pedestal, more likely."
"Mmm. It is a very high 'ass'."
"Are you admiring my bum!?"
"Yes. Marcus, you have a very nice...uh...'bum'."
[drunken preen] "Thank you."
"In fact, I think I would like to -- am I saying this properly? -- 'shag it'. Your bum, I mean."
[boggle] "I believe I'll come with you back to your quarters after all, Lennier."
"Excellent. We can continue our language lesson there. In private."
[standing and much tipsy straightening of clothes] "I don't suppose you've got soundproofing?"
"We could find out."
Archived by author's permission
Subject: MCEB-ff Yet Another Smutty Test
Oh, heavens, how did that word get up there? 'Smut'. To Smut.
Smut. Smutter. Smuttest.
Smutly Whiplash? SmutWinkle and Rocky the Smutting Squirrel?
[gives self good shake]
sorry, people, don't know what came over me.
"Slingin' Slang"
"Are you drunk?"
"Maybe. Why?"
[pause] "I find it curious that alcohol has such different affects on us than you humans. We are so similar and yet so different."
[bleary calculation] "If I were a little less drunk, I just might invite you to explore some of those differences with me."
"Why would you have to be a little less drunk?"
[embarrassed look] "After alcohol, sometimes the spirit is willing, but the flesh....shall we say..."
"Oh. I see. Why don't you come back to my quarters with me -- "
"Look, Lennier, I just finished trying NOT to say I'd like to shag you to within an inch of your life and I can't even get it up --" Swallow. "Oop. Forget I said that."
"Shag me?"
[pause] "Yessssss." [pause] "That doesn't offend you?"
[thinking of that time in the monastery] "No." [pause] "I am honored you think so highly of me."
"Highly my ass." Muttered darkly, "bleedin' pedestal, more likely."
"Mmm. It is a very high 'ass'."
"Are you admiring my bum!?"
"Yes. Marcus, you have a very nice...uh...'bum'."
[drunken preen] "Thank you."
"In fact, I think I would like to -- am I saying this properly? -- 'shag it'. Your bum, I mean."
[boggle] "I believe I'll come with you back to your quarters after all, Lennier."
"Excellent. We can continue our language lesson there. In private."
[standing and much tipsy straightening of clothes] "I don't suppose you've got soundproofing?"
"We could find out."